Better Men Film Club with Nick Flora
In this episode …
Aaron talks with friend and Coach Nick Flora about his Better Men Film Club & Podcast, a community of men dedicated to knowing themselves better and being better for the world around us through the lens of movies.
instagram.com/bettermenfilmclub/
SHOW NOTES
:29 min Aaron Talks
Thank you so much for listening. There is so much content out there. There is so many people with microphones in from tof their faces. So may movies.. that I appreciate you taking the time to listen to this.
We’ve had so many moves that have shaped us. When I started this podcast it came from this idea that we can attach ourselves to other peoples stories and characters in movies.
In the first season of TKOL I talked about movies and songs that shaped my early years and thinking.
Recently a friend and fellow coach Nick Flora, who’s been on the podcast before, has started Better Men Film Club where men get together and talk about the deeper meaning behind movies and the characters.
I thought I would bring Nick back to tell us what he’s up to.
2 min
Welcome back Nick ! Aaron talked about the movie High Fidelity in the first season and nick says thats the perfect entry point to Better Men Film Club.
There was a lot of one demential feelings in movies from similar movies. And Nick says when we were younger we dated girls cause they had our favorite bands T-shirt on.
4 min
BMFC is a space for men open p the capacity to go deeper
Nick and Aaron are a different breed of men who like to look underneath and ask deeper questions.
Aaron Talks about rob Jordan being self involved and how he related a lot at a young age to the character and even his transformation.
6:30 min
Nick says to take the next step to do something different instead of being surface level or one demential.
Nick says whatever makes you look at things outside of yourself while you’re also going in and example
A lot of time people attach themselves to stories in movies, like Aaron’s friend did with Back to the Future.
7:50 min
Aaron Asks how Nick facilitates the BMFC. Nick just restarted it. And they talked about the movie Stand By Movie and immediately shared things together.
If you went to tell a story about your childhood you would just repeat what you’ve told before but through the lens of a movie it makes you rethink and resurface new things.
11 min
Nick says we are visual creatures and sometimes it takes relating to a Character in a movie.
Art allows us to see something different about ourselves.
Nick says it’s like an empathy playground to Relate to different characters
13 min
It’s a gateway to looking at deeper emotions.
Aaron says because he’s seen men taught to suppress anger, he’s related to characters like being The Hulk with anger and about to go green.
Aaron Mentions another episode why men need each other.
Nick says men could understand that what we’ve been taught sometimes is actually the opposite like vulnerability.
Vulnerability is strength not a weakness, like asking for help or admitting that you don’t know something.
15 min
Historically a lot of white men has looked stupid because we were closed.
But asking for help is a power move.
Nick has learned so much by shutting up and listening. He says it’s important that we shut up and listen to learn more
16:40 min
Nick mentions the Chris Rock and Will smith slap. And what if we asked more questions about that ?
Do your family feel safe when you respond in violence?
What are you doing that you think is one way that’s actually coming off another way ?
18:30 min
Aaron asks what if Will Smith would have paused to reframe that moment. What would have been a different outcome ?
Will had so much time to rethink, so many steps to reconsider.
20 min
The messages we’ve been told through movies is to stand up and be a man. But, It’s our jobs as humans to be more evolved.
Aaron and Nick joke that BMFC is like fight club but just punching our emotions.
Aaron asks how this has made lives better.
22 min
It’s invited men to have more conversations and rethink the way they’re doing things.
Nick says we’re the first generation to be more inclusive and a little more in touch.
Men walk away rethinking their relationship dynamic.
24 min
Men are taught that if it has too much complexity to drop out.
Men are attracted to the machines.
Men wishing things for simpler.
Nick says we need to Understand that men have both feminine and masculine. Men tend to only tap into the masculine because of society.
Able to listen to a song and watch a movie and have emotions around it.
27:30 min
Nick jokes that he comes with a lot, it’s never a little… like the Catalina wine mixer.
Nick would like BMFC to grow. It’s like writing a song. You dream big. Just let it be what it is.
29:30 min
It’s the butterfly effect. You can’t change the whole world, but you can change your world right now. You only have control over that.
What are we doing if we’re not trying to be better and hopefully heal trauma.
Take that and pass it along to the next person.
31:30 min
Reimagining our meaning that we’re making up around our experiences.
Which character do you connect with?
You can go to bettermenfilmclub.com and sign up for their events in April.
32:50 min
Podcast is going every week with nicks friend who’s on a similar journey.
The podcast is equal parts movie nerd and equal parts looking out ourselves
Aaron could spend a lot more time but
34 min
Aaron Talks about how Forrest Gump gets him every time and his emotional intelligence.
He accepts everyone and accepts his callings.
Nick Flora, FG says yes to his calling and just loves everyone he comes in contact with.
He has mental issues but no qualms with who he is.
36:30 min
Aaron says, “Yes Forrest. Life is like a box of chocolates.”
37:20 min Aaron Closes
What do you think about attaching yourself to a character in a movie?
If you want to conned with Nick on every platform under Better Men Film Club.
If you are hurt and heartbroken and wanting to heal from a past relationship and find self-worth. You can reach out to me.
You’ve been listening to TKOL Podcast.
I’m Aaron
Best of Love to You.